Strange Dreams
by Lady Merlin
Summary: Not a crack!fic, I promise. Wilson has a strange dream and an epiphany while he's at it... HWslash one-shot. humorous. K for plain weirdness.


It feels like a crack!fic, it looks like a crack!fic, but it's not a crack!fic. Wilson just has a crack!dream and realises something.

It was a beautiful bright morning and the birds were chirping and the skies were blue and peppered with exactly 25.35 rainbows at 35 degrees to each other (here Wilson decided that something was off...but decided it was because his tie didn't match his shoes today) He was walking down the corridors and wishing a good morning to all he passed, looking for Cuddy. He needed to discuss something with her.

However, it seemed that there were an awful lot of fainted people in the hallways... a lot of patients, nurses, occasionally doctors... Now he was worried. He noticed a heap topped in blonde golden hair like no-one's-but-Chases'. He bent down, tapped it and Chase looked up, little pink hearts in his normally-brown-eyes. Wilson had a vague niggling feeling that he should not be alright with this, but it quickly vanished in the former concern. "You seem to have Heartingtons, Chase. I'll go and find you some Heartipills to make you all better," and so he set off to find the pills with a single minded determination. Again, there was a strange feeling and he didn't quite understand it, so he dismissed it.

As he walked, he suddenly heard Cuddy's voice. He turned towards her, because as Hospital administrator, Cuddy would know everything, including what was going on, and where the damn Heartipills were. There was another doctor there, arguing with her. He was wearing a white lab coat on jeans, and though Wilson could only see his back, he knew it was House. The cane was a dead giveaway.

House spun around, and Wilson felt his heart flutter. Nurses promptly fainted, as if on cue.

The white coat skimmed his body like a lovers fingers, and his jeans fit him perfectly, un-ironed creases and all. His blue shirt matched his stunning blue eyes and set them off, wonderfully. His face looked healthy, and the stubble gave him a rugged healthy aura, and he wondered what it would feel like to kiss those lips… He felt like he was melting into a puddle on the ground, and realised that his knees had given way. House bent, and helped him up, a genuine concerned look on his face.

He turned around, glaring at Cuddy. He ripped off his lab coat (and some fainted while others dove for the coat) and kicked it. "This is why I never wear the damn lab coat."

Cuddy was fanning herself, as if to keep from fainting as well, when she noticed the squabble for the lab coat. She yelled at everyone, and instead took the lab coat herself, and wrote at the bottom in magic marker, "from House, to Cuddy with love". She cackled evilly. No one would dare to doubt her, for she was the almighty AdMiNiStRaToR!!!

But all this Wilson noticed only faintly. He was preoccupied by House, who was holding him around the small of his back as they walked, talking about some patient with blazing determination in his eyes.

He suddenly turned to Wilson and proclaimed loudly, "I _love_ you!!!" and bent Wilson over and kissed him furiously, making Wilson stutter for breath, his heart beating so hard. House tasted like dark chocolate with a bitter-pill aftertaste. His hips were grinding against House's, and he felt so happy and at peace.

_This was the way the universe should be_, he thought as House pushed him against a wall.

Then suddenly, without warning, the warning sound in his head had gone on hyper drive, but so had his libido, and somehow, it was funner to listen to his libido than to that damn warning sound. It sounded like a freaking garbage truck backing up. Sometimes he wished he was more daring, like House… then he remembered, he was _kissing_ House…

House pulled away, bruised lips and all. "Wow, Wilson, you're a fantastic kisser…"

Suddenly, _It_ cracked. _It_, was nothing really in specific, it was just the entire universe. Giant gaps appeared behind House, and they held on until there was nothing left, not even House, and if House wasn't there, life wasn't worth living…

Wilson sat up in his bed, gasping and realised that it had all been a dream, and even in his dream-verse, House would never say that, so he woke up. He was drenched in sweat and he wondered what the hell it had meant, but even as he thought it slipped from his grasp until he had no clue why he was awake.

The doorbell rang and he got it, opening the door to a snow-covered House. House came in and Wilson helped him take off his coat, wordlessly. Suddenly he had a moment of de ja vu and his head threw him an idea of pinning House to a wall and kissing him senseless. He blushed when he registered the thought, and House raised an eyebrow.

"What? Trying to get me naked? Turn you on?" he asked, dryly.

Wilson rolled his eyes, all the while thinking, _You have _no_ idea…_

Well? How is it? I liked it, despite the slight discontinuity… R&R!!!

Love,

Lady Merlin


End file.
